Thank you for your words and encouragement in the comments of my last post. My knee is feeling better this week but not 100%. The pain has greatly subsided since my last post and I can walk up and down stairs normally again. I have an appointment on Monday with an orthopedist and am so hoping that there is some good news out of it. I've stopped Googling meniscal tears as they only lead me to believe that I will need surgery and will not be running NYC next month.
It's been hard this week to not run. It's been hard to go to practice and watch my kids do workouts knowing that I'm stuck there taking their splits rather than joining them.
It was hard to walk back from my car today, feeling the 89 degree warmth that this October day brought, and knowing that I can't go on my normally much-anticipated Friday run. I love running in the fall and I always look forward to Friday runs. For me, they far surpass any happy hour and are the perfect way to end a workweek.
This afternoon I noticed the trees and the grass that are drying up due to the lack of rain and the oncoming cooler weather that awaits us. The shorter days means the leaves are finally changing their colors even though I still sit here in shorts in a tank top. There is nothing more that I want to do than to run right now before the winter air comes.
My body and mind are ready to run. I crave to get back into nature and to feel the wind on my face and my feet flying over the leaves.
But that has to wait.
Every day I battle with myself: What if I don't have a tear. What if I'm making my knee worse by not doing anything with it? What if I just try to run for 5 minutes?
But - what if I try to run and the first step I take brings back the pain from Saturday and I've set myself back a week?
I'm constantly reminding myself of my goal. Monday is only three days away. I can and should be able to wait that long to find out if I can run or if I have something more serious. Usually I am confident that I can wait. And then 5 runners go by me on the walk to my car. It sucks to live in such a healthy city. Everyone is out there running.
Sometimes we don't take for granted what we have until it is taken away. I like to think that this year has fully taught my to appreciate what I have. I knew each day that I went running that I would not be doing it some day. If you're complaining about having to run or to workout, remind yourself of the good things it brings you. What would you do if the ability to do it was taken away?